TBI Life and a New School year

Tomorrow starts a big step for us.  DH starts yet another grueling semester for school, and Monster starts PPCD because he's behind in speech.

So, last Thursday, we had a meet and greet with his teacher and here he is with just one of the special people that will get to deal with him this year.

I don't know if I'm more worried about Monster or DH.  See, Monster is fairly smart, sometimes a little too smart for his own good.  While DH has problems with just basic classes.  I'm so proud of him for working as hard as he does every day for his grades.  So, it's another semester of me keeping Monster occupied while Daddy studies.  

Then, there's the times where DH gets so frustrated that he wants to quit.  He calls himself stupid and worthless, and it BREAKS. MY. HEART.

I know better.  I know he's incredibly smart, I know what he USED TO BE CAPABLE OF.  We both don't know what the future holds here. 

We talked about things when he first applied for the disability and we were going to travel the United States.  But then, he got the opportunity to go to school, and everything changed.  He's been unable to work and we've lost our house and truck.  We went from having funds to spare, to eating beans and rice to survive.  Now, our main focus is to get him through school.  With the TBI and Hydrocephalus comes the learning disabilities, the memory problems, the trouble walking.  I want to raise awareness for other soldiers coming back with unbearable headaches everyday, falling down for no reason, and forgetting just about everything.  For the spouses, trust me, it's not NORMAL!!! Get it checked out!

Because I insisted he go to the doctor for his headaches, we were thrust into a world of Special Needs and brain surgeries.  Never in a million years, would I have guessed that this would be my life, but it is.  Because he retired, we don't get the support from the military that other injured soldiers get.  There was NO REHAB of any sort for him.  Nothing to help with his memory problems or gain, except a cane...here ya go...good luck.  We're traveling this road alone.  No support from family and very few friends.  But I have to say, our church family has been wonderful...from helping DH with scholarships to school to the surprise baby shower when Monster was born early!

So, where am I going with this?  Just that tomorrow is a very big day!! After this semester, if DH passes, he will have enough credit to be a SENIOR! Monster starts school and I've never done the first day of the school year with any of my kids!! I'm nervous, and scared.  I know I will have to deal with the frustration, and yet, I wish life was easier sometimes.